Here are some things I've been reading and listening to these days:

• Our Public Meeting on Rest.
• Bart
• Henri Nouwen.
• Job 2:13

And most recently, this:

"...Doing what God asks is, of course, not something we can ever achieve in ourselves. Not only did God never mean us to do so, he intended that our failures in obedience lead us to surrender." - - David Benner's Surrender To Love

Can failure really be a catalyst for a deeper relationship with God?

Frequently, I'm disappointed, that the outcomes of my actions fall short of my expectations.

- As much as I'm counting on getting the job I interviewed for, and as much as I want it, I may
wait out this next week, only to recieve some disappointing news.
- I can't seem to get anyone organized, either to spend some time on a weekend over a meal,
speaking Spanish, or on a weeknight, to see a play.
- I spend some time planning a lesson for the English class I teach, only to get in front of the class
having no idea how to get myself started.
- I plan my cell in advance, and again, when it's time to sit together and share, I can't seem to
make the connections that will spark conversation.

I'm relying a lot on myself here. I'm relying on the plan. I'm relying a lot on the results, to feel good about myself when I go home at the end of the night.

And it's not happening right now.

Some Rules for Engagement

So, I've never done this before. Some of you, like my Dad, have been involved in discussion groups, like Food for Thought, that lay down good ground rules for conversations like these, that ensure the safety of the individuals involved. Here are some that come to mind:

- You, like me, are entitled to your opinion. It's distinctly yours and distinctly you. I will honor
it, whether or not I agree. I will honor you.

- I will be careful not to attack or accuse. I'll be sparing on personal judgments. Please forgive
me my assumptions, and gently correct me when I cross your boundaries. I'll try to do the
same.

- I know how limiting text can be to express how deeply we feel sometimes. Even so, let's limit
our punctuation marks to one at the end of our sentences. !!! 's especially are conversation
killers. We can take a break and come back, if we're that upset.

- Often there are a lot of deep wounds behind seemingly insignificant responses. In that light, I
will treat what I don't understand about you carefully, compassionately.


If we can agree, more even to the spirit of these words than the words themselves, let's continue।